being a student again...why i took the plunge

i'm in graduate school.  yes, almost 10 years after i graduated from wesleyan, i am back in school.  i'm getting my master's in counseling, and i have to admit, higher education is in fact like riding a bike.  sure, i had to get back into the swing of it, but once i adjusted, it's been smooth sailing.  i'm actually learning a lot and remembering a lot that i forgot :).  each semester i take 2 courses.  since this was my first semester, one class only lasted 4 weeks (an orientation class for online education).  i'm more than halfway through with my second class, and i have a 99.  i was really worried about the idea of taking classes strictly online.  i was afraid i was going to be one of those people who had to be in an actual classroom all the time--you know, the traditional brick-and-mortar program like i had in my undergrad days.  i surprised myself with how quickly i adjusted to online classes.  i love the flexibility of working on school when i want to (as long as i meet my deadlines, which i do), and i enjoy how different the interaction with my classmates is when all we have are our words.  it's been really fun to see my classmates take on the topics we study, because so many of them have real world experience in the field and can offer interesting perspectives that i can learn from.  i love it.  i have recommended online classes to several friends and am a firm believer in the idea.


i'm excited about being in school again too because i think that getting my master's will make achieving my long-term goal easier.  once i receive my Master's Degree, i plan to sit for the georgia state licensing exam.  my goal is to start a non-profit agency that specializes in working with patients with long-term, critical and terminal diseases.  there are many variables involved—insurance and financial issues, the need for proper self-care for the patient and the family, help with obtaining the necessary treatments, and even trauma counseling or crisis intervention.  i have seen first hand the need for this program and dream of being able to provide these services to others.  i wish to this day that an agency like that had been available to us all those years ago when my mother's illness first struck. mom helped start the MOST group because she felt the need to find a way to provide for others what hadn't been there when she was sick.  i'm inspired to do the same thing.  putting off grad school right after wesleyan was absolutely the right decision, because being able to be near mom during the last recurrence of her illness and being close enough to be there with her at the end was more than worth the delay.  the loss is still raw and painful to me, but her courage and dignity throughout her illness inspire me every day.  i know that she never wanted me to shelve my dreams for her sake, and i know that she is proud of me for what i am accomplishing.  almost 3 years now she's been gone...it seems so hard to believe.  on nights like this, when i'm exhausted and have work to finish, and the thought of phoning it in crosses my mind, i think about mom and what this would mean to her, and i know i could never give it anything more than my best.  she would expect nothing less, and i refuse to disappoint her.  

WTF is wrong with my cat?

some of you know my poor, dumb cat, sam.  lately, sam (or sammy cat kitty face, as i often call her) has had to wear a cone to keep her from scratching a spot on her neck.  it's bad (read: funny) enough that she becomes a bobblehead when she walks, or that she loses all depth perception, or that she tends to get stuck behind the couch when she forgets that she can back up.  tonight she took me by surprise with her newest cone behavior.

we were sitting on the couch watching 'the daily show'.  sam was in thomas's lap, minding her own business when i heard a sound.  i looked over at her to see what it was, and i found her licking the inside of the cone.  just licking away.  there was nothing on the cone, not that i could see, but she was going at it like it was coated in catnip.  now, i will say this.  last week, i saw joy licking the front door.  (yeah, i don't get that one either.)  bizarre cat behavior is nothing new in our house.  what startled me was the gusto with which sam was licking the plastic cone.  she hates wearing it, which made the the sudden 'it haz flavr' all the more confusing.  of course, the moment i noticed her doing it, she stopped and looked at me as if i had somehow offended her.  when i pointed this out to my husband, he took to tickling her and saying 'you can't do nothing about it' in this ridiculous voice.  then, he grabbed her legs and she proceeded to topple over like those fainting goats on youtube.  (seriously, they are pretty funny.  see them here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=we9_CdNPuJg)

she's gone back to acting all mopey and pitiful in the cone, but i'm not buying it now.  i've got you figured out now, cat.  i'm not falling for the 'poor me' act any more.  of course, i say that, but as soon as she mews and gives me that sad little face, i'll be right back to wanting to take the cone off of her, no matter how much she might like the plastic taste...which is her endgame, i know.  

what have i done now?

i have no idea what possessed me to start a blog.  it's not like my life is all that interesting, or that i want to spend any more time in front of the computer.  i'm a full time grad student...i spend half my life on this laptop.  even so, here i am.

i don't have any sort of plan for this thing.  just...saying what i think when i think it.  random thoughts as they pop up?  my commentary on the world around me?  some combination of both, i suspect.

anyway, welcome to anyone who might stumble across this experiment of mine.